Faces of BFY - Ying Rui

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"If I could give anything to a beggar, I would teach him how to get a job and the relevant skills if I were a boss, as opposed to just giving him money or food. As the saying goes, 'Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.'"

- Ying Rui (second from right, with BF Youths)

Quote for Today

"Have you noticed how, when we look at ourselves, we keep bumping into our obstacles?

That is why the practice can feel quite frustrating sometimes, if we don't have somebody experienced who can explain to us that obstacles are actually quite okay.

That to feel wretched, undermined and miserable is fine.

Because these are only states of mind, perceptions that are impermanent."

~ Ajahn Sundara 🙏

Food for Thought

I was feeling hungry at midnight, so I had a sandwich with milk. It felt really satisfying. Thinking about it, it would be a satisfying breakfast, but not lunch or dinner. Funny, isn't it?

It's interesting to see how perceptions and expectations form based on our habits and routines. This would be a typical breakfast for me, and a satisfying midnight snack as I don't usually eat supper. However being accustomed to eating staple rice or noodles that is savoury and complete with ingredients for lunch and dinner, a sandwich would fall short of my expectations. An enlightened person would see food as its function; to abate hunger and sustain life. However most of us attach craving towards it, seeing it as a source of pleasure. We may not realise this most of the time.

It is a gradual training to bring awareness to this craving and expectations (in my interpretation); to see that there is craving rather than condemning it and trying to get rid of it. Meditation is a training to develop mindfulness, in and out of meditation. This is a rather insightful quote on meditation.

"The training doesn't ask us to be any particular way in any particular situation, but through it we begin to teach our mind how to recognise the mind-state of kindness.

As we are sitting, we recognise when we are going to war with ourselves, or trying to control our thoughts and perceptions so that they constantly fit into the perfect world we want.

We are not open and relaxed in the present moment.

I suppose this need to be present, here and now, is something I learned from my teacher, Ajahn Sumedho.

He spoke with great confidence about returning again and again to what he called "the real", no matter what we are thinking about.

Always back to the "real"."

~ Ajahn Sundara 🙏

What is not "the real": the expectations we have of our mind; controlling thoughts, perceptions and whatsoever to fit the ideal mental state of meditation we perceive (as mentioned by Ajahn Sundara)

"The real" involves letting go of such expectations, not being in a constant struggle to control thoughts and such.

Faces of BFY - Manfred

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"My dad paid for my Melbourne school trip last year. It was unexpected as he declined to pay for it many times until the last call for booking. He was still unwilling to pay for it even after he found out about the subsidy and I pestered him a lot. I was about to give up when he finally agreed because my teacher told him that it was good for me to bond with my classmates. The trip was very fun and gave me a lot of happy memories with my secondary school classmates and schoolmates and was a good reward for completing my N Levels. Usually he would not pay for such an expensive trip as he does not like to spend money."
- Manfred

Faces of BFY - Nicola

4 MORE DAYS before early bird price for the camp closes on Sunday 23 November! So what are you waiting for? Sign up at http://bit.ly/pushingboundaries_4 NOW!

"My joy comes from being able to provide my friends and loved ones with what they need. Seeing someone happy and knowing that you have helped to bring about that happiness, even if for a short moment, brings much satisfaction and joy to me.

And because I have given, therefore I have received.  Many a times, I have been on the receiving end of a very generous act, mostly unexpected and sometimes at the moment when I needed it the most. A simple example where my ezlink card ran out of money and I didn’t have enough spare coins, the bus driver very kindly allowed me to pay what I had, even though it was less than the required amount for where I was going. You can say that the bus driver didn’t have a choice and so had to just allow me anyway, but no, he DID have a choice. He could have scolded me, given me a black face or even worse, chase me off the bus. But during the few incidents in which it happened (not that I do it on purpose of course), the bus drivers were very kind and allowed me to stay on the bus. For this simple thing I am grateful. Because I have seen worse things happen when people don’t have spare change to pay for their bus ride.

And that’s how it often is, because we have seen the negative, we appreciate the positive. And when we are on the receiving end of positivity, it inspires us (at least it inspires me anyway) to do the same for others.  

However the form in which I have received was not necessarily the form in which I have given. When the motivation behind giving is one of positivity and good intention, naturally what you receive will be of the same nature. And I know this to be true because I have experienced it for myself.

So if you were to ask if I’m a giver or a taker, I would say again that because I have given, therefore I have received. And because I have received, I give."
- Nicola

Faces of BFY - Hugo

Registration for the camp is now OPEN!  So what are you waiting for? Sign up at http://bit.ly/pushingboundaries_4 NOW! :D The theme for November is Generosity!

"I think the majority of Singaporeans are rather generous. There are some who are really stingy and selfish; asking them to share is like asking them to give up one of their legs, hahaha. But as a whole, as a community, I've seen Singaporeans give on a lot of occasions. I've seen people giving up their seats on the train or on the bus, neighbours sharing food with other neighbours and often even giving money to beggars or buskers. Singaporeans may be seen as 'kiasu' or 'selfish' most of the time, but if you look closely and observe, you'll see that there are a lot of people who behave otherwise :)" - Hugo